“This project in Taipei is really taking off, it would probably make a lot of sense for me to be based there rather than fly back and forth each month”
Over the past year, I had flown to Asia at least 10 times. Business class flights are not cheap, and with hotels and meals included it would be far cheaper for the company for me to stay in Taipei
This was all very logical, how could they say no?
But my manager was having none of it
“Who is the girl?” he asked
Beijing
Beijing winters are harsh and dirty, each breath a frozen intake of dirt and coal dust. There are few places I would rather not be, but it is difficult to speak at a conference unless you are actually present
But wait, who is that?! They invited fashion models?
(Winnie made me write that)
I worked my way across the room, stopping at the side of my good friend, Bill
“Ahh, Jeremy. This is Doctor Wu, and this is…”
“Hi, I’m Winnie”
Somehow (I have no idea how it happened) Winnie and I were seated next to each other at lunch. and she tried convincing me that we were eating dog (“Don’t you know, Chinese eat everything.”) Later that day I talked her into skipping a few hours of the conference to shop for a sweater. I was freezing, honest.
I was definitely a bad influence. But a few days later, back in our respective cities, Winnie had already forgotten who I was
Downsizing
From Day 1 as a homeowner in Seattle, I loathed my house. That isn’t too strong of a statement
Everything about it was less than ideal. For example, the neighbors would sometimes stop by to inform me that my grass was 31 mm tall, a clear violation of the maximum 30 mm stated in the neighborhood covenants
And the location. How is it possible for a 4 lane super highway to have an effective max speed of 30 mph from 7 to 10 am? Tired of the traffic, I tried taking the bus, a 90 minute slog of transfers and waiting
I even tried biking a few times, but the 11 mile ride nearly killed me so I gave up (years later I would do that ride in 30 minutes without breaking a sweat and hungry for more)
It was time to get rid of this albatross around my neck. I hired an agent who advised I list the property at $50k more than what I had paid for it. And then I waited… and waited… and waited.
Nobody wanted this house, least of all me
I’m sure there are some great Real Estate agents in the world, but I have yet to meet one. This one was less skilled than most, a one trick pony whose sole strategic move was, “Lower the price!”
But we’d already tried that with no measurable increase in potential buyers. Instead of reducing the price further, I reduced my costs. By firing the agent
Seattle
Tired and hungry, I was about to head home from work when the phone rang
“Hi, Jeremy this is Bill. I have the flu, would you be able to take some out of town guests to dinner?”
“Uh… I don’t know… who is it?”
“It’s Doctor Wu and Winnie”
“You get some rest, Bill. I have this covered”
The flu virus must have been working overtime, because the good Doctor was also too tired to make it to dinner. Afterwards, I gave Winnie a short tour of the city. A short tour of the city turned into a Saturday drive to the mountains, where Winnie saw snow for the first time. A Saturday drive to the mountains turned into me flying to Chicago for the weekend, where Winnie would have meetings on Monday. Me flying to Chicago led to Winnie changing her Chinese New Year destination from Florida to Seattle
As the Immigration Officer that processed our marriage visa eloquently stated, using his fingers to make quote signs, “So… is that when your relationship ‘started?’ ”
I suppose it was. And it continued with my monthly business trips to Taipei
For Sale by Owner
With a big For Sale by Owner sign in the front yard, I was ready to get this house sold
When I wasn’t working or on business trips, I painted the entire interior, installed two ceiling fans, fixed a small crack in the bedroom ceiling, replaced the hideous wallpaper in the master bath, trimmed the overgrown trees in the back yard, and installed 5 yards of fresh mulch in the landscaping. Oh, and fixed the giant hole in the wall that my ex had left behind
Good times
I had a few interested parties, but nothing worked out
“Are you aware that a registered sex offender lives 2 miles from here?” asked one guy, as he withdrew his offer
“2 miles? Why, that is practically just next door”
It was difficult juggling it all, so I considered once again hiring a professional. One Realtor® recommended I raise the price (is there any other profession that calls themselves by a registered trade mark?) but otherwise offered nothing new
In one last ditch DIY effort, I paid $400 for a service to list the house in the MLS with a 3% fee to the buyer’s agent.
The asking price was $50,000 greater than I was asking 1 week before. I had a full price offer by the end of the first day
I almost felt bad selling it to the couple that was designing a 1 hour commute into each of their lives (In the same direction, but “We can’t commute together because we work different hours.”) But they were happy because they were buying the biggest house they could afford in a “good school district”
Taipei
I must have been an interesting case in the eye of my employer. Everybody around me was upgrading their kitchen, or buying a bigger house, or showing off their new Lexus or BMW.
I had just sold my house, rented a room in a stranger’s house, and started biking to work. I couldn’t have been happier. My housing costs had just plummeted, the 3 mile bike ride to work was quick and easy, and I was flush with cash for the first time in my life.
It was the perfect time to make a completely ridiculous request
“I think it would be fair to continue paying me my normal salary, and if my living in Taipei doesn’t work out… I’m very familiar with the flight options for the return to Seattle”
After a few discussions like this, my employer agreed. I would move to Taipei.
I’m certain that my new freedom was a major factor. It made business sense, certainly, but there was also the concern that if I didn’t move to Taipei with my current employer I might just find a new one
But nothing in the corporate world is simple or easy, every expat package had to be similar to avoid potential discrimination lawsuits
Instead of continuing to pay my US salary, they would give me a 10% “hardship allowance” and pay my rent. Nice
Winnie and I moved in together, and were largely inseparable.
She had never cooked a day in her life, but after we read Your Money or Your Life she ventured into the kitchen and discovered she loved it. I learned how freeing it could be to live completely car free, and why Winnie had never had a driver’s license
Although I worked like a dog lest I be called back to the US, we took every opportunity to travel all over the region, going to Palau, the Philippines, Thailand, Bali, and to the beaches of Southern Taiwan.
Life was good
Seattle
My manager left the company to be CTO of a rapidly growing tech company. I should have gone with him, I would easily have an extra $10+ million hidden under my mattress
But after evaluating all of the options, I chose the lesser of all evils and moved back to Seattle to take over his job
Things were complicated. The only way Winnie and I could stay together was for her to move to Seattle, which meant marriage (we can’t have illegal aliens coming into the US, after all)
It was a scary topic for both of us, and we dealt with it by avoiding it for weeks. Or months
I had a business trip to New York and Winnie and I spent the weekend in NYC. On my 33rd birthday we were standing next to the bull statue on Wall Street, and at that moment thanks to a bull market and a portfolio of 100% stock, my net worth exceeded $1 million for the first time (albeit temporary.) Happy Birthday to me!
Everything seemed great
Unless you were Winnie. She had left her job, her friends, and her family, and was alone in a new city with a guy that worked too much and was terrified of marriage. Fiercely independent, she was watching her savings dwindle because she refused to spend any of “Jeremy’s money”
After months of tension and avoidance, it all finally became too much. She had reached her breaking point, “Fuck this guy!”
That evening, everything exploded. In the only real argument we have ever had, months of anger and frustration came pouring out in a verbal onslaught. Here was a woman I loved more than anything, and I was losing her because of my fear and embarrassment.
Did I say any of that? Of course not. I yelled back. And then… I almost called her by my ex-wife’s name, which scared me more than all of the rest
A few moments later, Winnie walked out the door.
It would be 2 years before we would speak again
—
That was fun. Thanks to a browser crash I was able to enjoy writing this story twice. I hope if it twice as good the second time
It is now officially Winnie’s birthday, so I’ll be off the computer for the weekend. Thanks for reading!
If you enjoyed this post, be sure to read the rest in the series:
Episode 1 – Clawing Out of Debt
Episode 2 – Lifestyle Inflation
Episode 3 – Paying Dues
Episode 4 – A Tale of Two CitiesEpisode 5 – The Final Chapter
Wow! Not what I expected to hear, but it’s fun to hear your journey! Good thing it all worked out :)
arrrgghhh.. way to end on a cliff hanger!
Wow, what a story. Looking forward to Part 5.
Wait, what? She left you? This is getting hairier than a Mexican telenovela. :)
And I just realized in that last pic, Winnie is tossing you off of the Pyramid of the Moon (or is it Sun?) in Teotihuacan. She knows how to pick those human sacrifices well.
She couldn’t find a virgin, but I was conveniently close by
The suspense is killing me!
What a wonderful story, looking forward to the next iteration. More importantly, is that Giordano’s deep dish in Chicago?
Excellent question! Yes, yes it is
Another exciting chapter, complete with a cliffhanger.
Maybe screenwriting is in your future. Can you write about super heroes?
I thought I was writing about super heroes :)
I can’t believe you let her go. Men.
I have read that many couples separate before marriage.
We did too. But, it wasn’t 2 years!
More like 2 hours. Ha. My then boyfriend, now husband wasn’t certain. He had broke it off. He was telling one of the guys he worked with about it. The guy said, “Man, you should give her a chance.” “But if not, give me her phone number!” LOL!
The very thought of some other guy calling, sent him right back to me. :))
We are now in our 31st year of marriage.
Congratulations on 31 years! We will hit year 5 soon. Here’s to many more
As for letting her go… As you say, Men
I am holding my breath until the next chapter ;-)
Congrats on Winnie’s Birthday! Have fun celebrating.
And as noted above a couple of time, what a cliffhanger……have to stay tuned!
Geez, Jeremy — international man of mystery, financial wizard, and virtuoso writer all rolled into one package. That may have been the most intricately structured piece of writing I’ve ever seen on an early retirement blog, and you pulled it off without a hitch. Maybe you should let your browser crash on you more often.
haha, you are too kind brooklynguy
I’m really excited to read part 5. One of the things I train people on is how not to fall for people overseas (I did it in Vietnam), as they are likely trying to get something out of you. Glad to see that this was not the case for you.
Maybe Winnie is playing the loooooong game? :)
10 years ago I might have written something very similar. That was part of my problem
A wall doesn’t discriminate. It can keep out potential pain, suffering, or loss, and with equal effectiveness, love
Wow…not what I was expecting! The suspense is killing me…you know how to leave your readers wanting more. Happy Birthday to Winnie.
Happy Birthday Winnie.
I can only handle the wait cause I know how it turns out. :D
You didn’t see each other for 2 years!!??!! I must know more! I’m glad at least that I know there’s a happy ending.
What awesome storytelling – this whole week I was literally checking your blog twice per day to see if you’d updated. What a nice Friday treat. Now that I’ve subscribed to Team Curry Cracker, I’ll hopefully stop doing that :)
Wow what a story! Really enjoyed this series so far. Your story is kinda similar Mrs. T and I…well minus the million part though. Can’t wait to read more.
Happy Birthday Winnie!
Jeremy, cliffhangers are evil.
Just imagine if GCCjr is born in the next few days and I take a couple weeks off ;)
I will try to sell my house the way you sold your house. Smart people are always very creative in their thought. You are cuter than bull, I always wanted to take a picture with that bull. You and Winnie make a cute couple too.
Based on my own experience, there is zero reason to hire an agent, but lots of incentive to pay (bribe) the buyer’s agent
Good strategy! How much more is 3% than normal up there?
You’re really milking this story! Serious though, this is great to read for us aspiring to your level. It’s reassuring to see that you don’t have to do everything right early on to make this work.
People seem to like it, so absolutely I’m milking it :)
But I’ll get back to juicy financial posts in short order
What!!?? Two years? I can understand two months, but two years? Chop, chop. Back to the keyboard kind sir!:)
Can’t wait to see how this all turns out.
I can’t complain about the outcome
Great story, but you’re killin’ us with the wait of how the boy gets the girl.
Happy Birthday Winnie, make sure Jeremy treats you like the Queen that you are. ;)
Not just on her birthday, but every day
This story just keps getting better…especially knowing the happy ending / real time bliss. I must say that you continue to impress, Jeremy, including completely “out-kicking your coverage” when it comes to Winnie. I’m happy for you both. :)
What can I say, I’m really good at doing stupid stuff
Actually…you seem to do incredibly smart stuff. ” Out-kicking your coverage “….according to Urban Dictionary…is “to engage in a romantic relationship with a person who is much better looking and/or smarter than you. ” It’s a ( backhanded ) compliment ! :) Your story/blog is a great one….and continues to get better all the time.
Ha! I interpreted it as an American Football reference and a poor move in general
But thanks! Winnie agrees
You showed her! ;) Can’t wait to hear how you reconciled!
This story just keeps getting better. I had no idea you guys had a rocky patch. Looking forward to the next update.
Also looking forward to the next update. Oh and you better not pull a “Just Kidding” on us on April 1st…
I have something much better in mind
What a wonderful story. Most early retirement blogger’s lives seem so perfect like they made every decision right. I love the honesty in your writing. Can’t wait to read the next post.
Excellent writing. To get some perspective of time, can you give us some insight on month/year of when you became a dollar millionaire for the first time. Throwing in some month/year at times will help us get a better perspective.
Hi pop. That would have been August of 2007.
Jeremy & Winnie,
Congratulations on the Forbes article. I am sure it will drive lots of traffic to your blog. Just do not forget those who have been followers from the early days. :)
Haha, thanks Dave. Yesterday was a really big day.
I hope it is more than temporary, but you never know. I’m sure some percentage of new people will fit in just great with all of us old timers
Jeremy,
It’s a cliffhanger for sure, but I’m glad to know this story has a happy ending. :)
Congrats on the recent press as well. Looks like you guys popped up on Yahoo today.
Have a great weekend and a great b-day celebration!
Best regards.
It’s a cool Birthday present, we were on Forbes and Yahoo home pages and are right now the Featured Article on Forbes. It is crazy!
This sounds ridiculous, but you’re on the front page of yahoo twice right now. Right next to each other. Wut wut.
This series is so dramatic and you keep us wanting more. I hope you post the next part soon! It sounds like you survived through some really stressful things.
congrats for the recent press, i checked your article on fobes.
you guys are so damn cute together, makes me happy seeing the pictures. Thanks for all the great stuff on the blog. My GF are on a similar path!
Not all Financial Advisors are bad. I was separated after 33 yrs and divorced after 39 years. Only worked for 4, so I have NO Social Security or Medicare/Medicaid. Neither did my ex. He hid all income, off shore. Luckily, when we sold our property, in 2007 (nick of time) I took my half then (or else I’d probably be living under a bridge now). Everyone told me the money I had (which I thought was a lot) wasn’t enough unless I planned to die in 17 years. I have no clue how to invest. The only example I have is that my brother tried to invest on his own and lost it all and had to go back to work. I have lived for 8 years and still have the same net worth. The funny bit is the accountant (tax attorney) said I was paying too much for my money management, and the FA said I was paying too much for the accountant. I felt it all money well spent, since I was worried about the IRS and HIS record of not filing. I needed to protect myself. I’ve spent a lot in the past 8 years supporting my grown childrens’ endeavors. And still, I have the same net worth. I have enjoyed reading your blog. My oldest son’s wife does do her own investing and opened a retirement account at her first job. She has also set aside college accounts for their children (5). She had a hard time convincing my son to do the same (since he was raised to not save or invest), but she’s a smart lady, with good math skills. By signing up will I get the next installment of your lovely blog in my email? Travel might be nice. I’ve limited it to St. Louis and Guatemala, so far. I don’t know yet what I want to be when I grow up.
Hi Connie
Welcome. I’m like you, I’m still figuring out what I want to be when I grow up
The mailing list is a great way to get the latest updates, all of the posts get sent out via email that way
Divorce is really nasty, I’m sorry you had to go through that. It sounds like you’ve come out a stronger person
All the best
Jeremy
Man, can’t believe you guys didn’t see each other for two years either.
Please include all the details of the relationships on both sides during this time for extra drama!
Thx,
Sam
Wow, I was so happy reading the beginning of the post, then started to see the bad things coming, until the cliffhanger at the end got me almost crying… I know the story ends well because this blog exists, but I can’t wait to read part 5
Hi… I. follow you on Twitter, and a member of the forum. I just wanted to say I appreciate these older posts that are posted to Twitter. There’s so much good information the timeframe is irrelevant. The story and circumstances are relevant and very interesting. Thx!